Susan Allison-Dean - Read-Ponder-Comment Blog

Why Every nurse needs to see this movie

9/12/2024

It wasn’t that long ago, pre-1995 to be exact when those who sustained a spinal cord injury resulting in paralysis had little to no hope to walk again.  As a nurse who has practiced since 1987, I witnessed first-hand what those living with paralysis endured.

Sure, there were a few, like a man I will call Jim. Jim’s wife left him after his accident left him paralyzed from the waist down. He became the only parent of their two children. Yet, Jim, who had remarkable grit and determination, found ways to work around what he couldn’t do, focused on what he could do, and raised his two children.

Then there were others like Todd who sunk into a deep, unsavable depression.  In my early years of nursing, I often cared for Todd on a med-surg floor.  Despite all our efforts, bringing in every consult we could think of, Todd refused to move and allowed his body to rot.  His amputations began at his feet, and he sustained pressure ulcers right to the bone.  With each admission, the surgeons were forced to amputate more of his lower extremities until he had a deep hip debridement and colostomy and eventually died.

In 1995, however, the man many of us only knew as Superman was thrown off a horse and instantly became a ventilator-dependent quadriplegic. This September, Super/Man: The Christopher Reeve Story will be released in theaters, sharing his intense and impactful journey.

Nurses everywhere will no doubt relate to how Chris changed from thinking a hero is a person who commits to courageous action despite the consequences to a hero is an individual who finds the strength to endure despite overwhelming obstacles.  Nurses who see this film will be reminded that the care they deliver daily, often painstakingly, matters.

Today, people like Jim can tap into resources to enhance their quality of life through the Christopher and Dana Reeve Paralysis Resource Center, which Dana created, understanding that while we work for a cure, life is worth living. Today, people like Todd have the option of real hope that they may one day walk again thanks to the continued dedication to finding a cure for paralysis that Chris initiated through the Christopher and Dana Reeve Foundation. Chris was fond of saying, “When we choose hope, anything is possible.”  Gosh, couldn’t we all use a dose of hope now?

Enjoy the movie trailer and purchase your tickets today:
https://www.fathomevents.com/events/super-man-the-christopher-reeve-story/

Book Review: The Women

4/21/2024

Despite the profound accolades I was seeing about Kristin Hannah’s latest book, The Women, part of me was hesitant to read it for two reasons.  One, as a nurse, I was concerned the subject matter covering nurses who served in the Vietnam War might trigger me.  While I have never served in a war, I have done frontline nursing for many years in a level-one trauma hospital.  I have seen and cared for my share of patients impacted by horrible situations.  I entered nursing during the beginning of the AIDS epidemic, which like COVID-19, was wrought with uncertainty, fear, and ostracizing.

Second, I have no tolerance for writers who try to write about a certain population and miss the mark because they have not lived the experience of those they are writing about.  Could Hannah capture what it is really like to be a nurse?  Could she serve and pay tribute to the nurses who practiced in the Vietnam War?

I downloaded the audiobook and after a few weeks, I decided to listen to it.  I’m glad I did.  This is probably one of the best books I have ever read.

Frances “Frankie” McGrath, the story’s protagonist, is a young woman from a privileged California family.  She grew up surfing, spending time with her brother and her parents who belonged to the local country club.  Her father, Connor McGrath, had long admired the men who served in wars and proudly displayed a hero's wall of pictures of the family who had served.  Wanting to please their father and serve their country, Fiona’s brother, Finley, and Fiona enlisted in the armed services.  Finley paid the ultimate sacrifice which left an indelible mark on the family.

While Finley’s service was revered by Connor, Fiona’s was not.  Like many women of her time, she was expected to get married, have children, and support her husband.  Her choice to enroll in the army as a newly graduated nurse was not only admonished by her parents, it left a veil of shame.

The novel is packed with tension.  The tension between Fiona and her family; the anxious, high-pressure stakes that come when a clinic is relentlessly inundated with trauma victims, as well as angst and turmoil within the characters themselves.  The way Hannah expertly crafted the story, weaving all of these situations, left me in awe and satisfied knowing the characters' motives, feelings, and weaknesses.

Was my fear of being triggered by this book valid?  Yes, in a way. Reading about the first-hand accounts of intense trauma and the unrelenting, uncontrollable rate at which the soldiers arrived at the medical camps, brought up memories for me.  The pace and the descriptions were detailed so that they didn’t sugarcoat the events, but they were balanced with treasured moments such as the unbreakable bonds formed and the immense joy and rebirth that can come from respite experiences.  As a reader, this aspect rendered the experience more palatable.

Did Hannah chronicle the nurses and other service persons who served in the Vietnam War in a way that honored them?  Absolutely.  It was evident that the author did her homework to pay homage to the sacrifices, as well as detail the devastating impacts of war long after it was over.  Hannah shares her personal story in the acknowledgements of how the Vietnam War impacted her at an early age as well as on podcasts who have interviewed her.  This was not a project she took on lightly and it was evident.  Writing about this historic moment in time took emotional fortitude. I especially appreciated her detailed acknowledgment of the nurses and other Veterans who helped her create the book.  I was also touched when Hannah described how the actions of nurses and other healthcare professionals during the early days of the COVID-19 pandemic, inspired her to write the novel that had long simmered in her.

Hannah’s gratitude and tribute to those who stepped up to serve others was genuinely heartfelt.  This comes at a time when we need to collectively heal from so much trauma and tension that is part of our communal past and present.

Pick up a copy of The Women at your local bookstore or order a copy now: https://amzn.to/4d0HXDH

Book Review: The in-between-unforgettable encounters during life's final moments

4/10/2024

The evolution of societal perspectives on spirituality and the afterlife has indeed been significant. Historically, those who claimed to see spirits or communicate with the deceased were often marginalized or institutionalized. However, contemporary views have shifted towards a broader acceptance of spiritual experiences as part of the human condition. This change reflects a deeper understanding of death as a natural and integral aspect of life, rather than a taboo subject.

Hospice nurse, Hadley Vlahos, shares her journey into the realm many in our culture would much rather avoid-- dying.  Just as nurses are granted the honorable opportunity to be present to people entering this world, hospice nurses are invited to bear witness and support humans in our transition out of this earthly journey.   And, just like life, no two journeys are the same.

Disguising names and removing identifying factors that would breach the confidentiality we nurses are held to uphold, Vlahos shares the stories of twelve patients she helped transition to the afterlife.  The heart-wrenching moments may require tissues, I know I needed a few, as patients and their loved ones struggle to let go, attend to the pain and suffering, but ultimately reach the point of taking their final breath.

At the same time, the stories are filled with hope, compassion, deep love, and commitment, as well as peace and joy.  Every dying patient is greeted by someone they knew previously who already crossed over. Reading how the patients reunited with departed loved ones in the final days of life, was something I found validating from my own personal and professional experiences, as well as comforting as a human destined for the same fate.

Weaved into the patient accounts Vlahos openly and vulnerably tells her personal story as a young woman who became pregnant at the age of 19 and became a nurse to support herself and her son.  Nursing is not an easy profession by any means.  It requires fortitude in mind, body, and spirit.  It requires intelligence and navigating the fine line between being sympathetic and empathetic, something Vlahos describes.  This noble profession is not as well-supported as the public would probably like to believe.  Short staffing, poor compensation, and lack of resources are a constant that nurses also have to battle.  I hope that those who read this take note of this and advocate for safe staffing and fair compensation for the healthcare staff who serve them.

While Vlahos's young, fresh voice is a breath of fresh air to dying and those who care for them, she may have given more tribute and recognition to the many nurses who paved the way before her.  At times she expressed gratitude to those who shared wisdom and support, there were other times when her tone felt disrespectful of those who have been attending to patients for years under circumstances much harsher than what Vlahos has experienced thus far.  Although some of her frustrations were valid, it would have been nice to see her offer some of the grace and compassion to her co-workers that she offered her patients.  Perhaps that will come with time and more experience.

The In-Between is a poignant exploration of the transition between life and death, offering solace and understanding to those grappling with the loss of loved ones. It suggests that the end of life need not be a journey taken in solitude but can be a passage accompanied by care and compassion. The narrative provides a gentle reminder that kindness and empathy are invaluable, especially in our final moments. This book may be a source of comfort for many, affirming the presence of benevolence even in the most challenging times. It's a testament to the human spirit's capacity for love and support, extending beyond the confines of our physical existence.

Order The In-Between now: amzn.to/3PVlDRX or visit your nearest library or independent bookstore to pick up a copy.

If you enjoyed The In-Between, you may also like Touched By A Nurse, a compilation of nurses' stories from across the world to which I was a contributor.

To read more books written by nurses, visit: LINK

Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift, What's not to love?

1/29/2024

I’m not a Swifty.  Nothing against Taylor or her music, just not my generation of music.  But I do highly applaud her dedication to her craft and her magnificent rise to financial success.

I am not a fan of football either.  If you scroll through my social media posts of mine over the years, you will find me questioning this sport that collides grown men together and leaves some with life-long brain injuries.  Yet, I have been highly engrossed watching the past couple of Kansas City Chiefs games.

Even my husband remarked yesterday, “ I can’t believe you are watching this football game.  I have never seen you like this.  Who do you want to win?”

“I don’t care who wins, honestly, I am just inquisitive about this relationship between Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift, and the public's reaction to it.  I find it fascinating to watch when Travis has a big play, and the cameras pan over to Taylor, the furor it creates on X (formerly known as Twitter).

Early on in the matchup between the Ravens and the Chiefs “Taylor Swift” was unsearchable on X.

A google search asking why yields the following:

That is how intense this relationship has become in our culture.

X users found workarounds, searching and using just the first and/or last names of Kelce and Swift.  The conversations for and vehemently against their relationship, the NFL flashing scenes of Swift and her friends in the booth at the game, and the individuals themselves made them trend for hours on X.

What ultimately intrigues me is this.  If these two individuals are highly beloved by the football-loving typically male community, and the rising empowered female collective, why aren’t we celebrating the love?

I guess this is why I find myself watching football all of a sudden.  It is like watching a real-life, modern love story in real-time.  Not one where the female character is saved by the male hero, think Cinderella, but one where two highly accomplished people, come together for love, not needing each other to survive financially.  Two people who can be there to enjoy and support each other's success and realization of the deep commitment it has taken to excel at their crafts.  Two people who have grown skin so thick that it is nearly impenetrable to the constant intrusion into their private lives that comes with that level of celebrity.

So, who do I hope wins the game?  I hope Travis and Taylor do.  As far as the Super Bowl?  I don’t really care.

Would love to hear your emotionally intelligent, respectful comments on this topic below.

Book Review: bright lights, big christmas

1/16/2024

The holidays are over, and we have put away our decorations, but it is never too early to plan for next Christmas!  Add Mary Kay Andrew’s heartwarming and festive book, Bright Lights, Big Christmas to your TBR list now.  It will help celebrate the true meaning of Christmas.    Plan to buy extra copies to give as gifts as well.

I was intrigued by an email from Quail Ridge Books, a local indie bookstore, announcing a live book event and signing with Mary Kay Andrews.  After I read what the book was about, I instantly signed up and invited some friends as well.  Ms. Andrews didn’t disappoint.

Andrews captivated the audience by sharing the origin of the story’s idea, the research she did to write it as well as taking questions from the audience.  What hooked me on this book was the theme of New York City Christmas trees.

My husband is a professional landscaper who has co-designed and plant located for Rockefeller Center for over twenty years.  He located the 1996 famous tree right in our hometown of Armonk, New York.

We have also made many trips to West Jefferson in the mountains of North Carolina, to hand-pick the best trees in the fields to bring to Rockefeller as accent trees to the crown jewel that stands above the ice skating rink.  Andrews's story brought back warm memories as well.

The book is short, with a romantic theme that Andrews described as the reserve of a Hallmark story.  Instead of the protagonist escaping the city and finding love in the country, Kerry Tolliver finds love and a new purpose in the city that never sleeps after being raised in the rural mountains in the south.

The story is interesting as Andrews shares the amazing ways Kerry and her brother set up a pop-up tree business in the middle of a busy, popular neighborhood in New York City based on real-life experiences.  I found myself reading just a page or two at the end of the book so I could make it last a little longer.

Consider picking up the book from your favorite local, independent bookstore now and tucking it away with your Christmas décor.  Or order it now:  LINK

Andrews also shared with us, that she and some fellow Southern women’s literature authors started a Facebook page, Friends and Fiction.  If you enjoy fiction, consider joining the page.  I have found some good reads on it.

Emotional Regulation-would it have saved this nurse's Life?

11/5/2023

Another nurse has been violently killed by a patient. This time in Connecticut. Nurse Joyce Grayson, 63, of Brooklyn, was found dead on Oct. 28, 2023 inside a Willimantic halfway house for sex offenders where she was visiting a patient.

She is far from the first nurse murdered or severely injured, and the nursing profession demands to know when is this going to stop. Just last year, I attended a prayer session for a nurse colleague, Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner, June Onkundi, who I didn’t know personally, but was violently stabbed in a clinic by a patient she was caring for. I cannot express the horror and sorrow, not to mention the reality of the situation that one feels sitting in a pew, facing a young colleague's body lying in a casket. The heartbreak seeing her four young children walk into the church alongside their father who looked catatonic with disbelief. The pain of those of us who were there and paid witness as family and friends paid their tributes and poured their emotions out for hours.

The bigger issue here, in my opinion, whether it be nurses who are being killed or injured, children being shot in their schools, or terrorists inflicting barbaric assaults on fellow human beings, is the ability to self-regulate emotions.

Is it time we radically accept that when humans are unable to self-regulate emotions in a healthy, balanced way, they either implode or explode?  Imploders numb emotional pain by overeating, smoking, and/or taking painkillers which can easily lead to a lethal path of addiction or die by suicide.  Exploders take their anger and pain out on others.

What if we identified and began to educate people on how to better emotionally regulate?  What if we taught this to kids?  What if we identified those with no, or grossly debilitated ability, to feel empathy and came up with a way to protect general society from their potential wrath? What if we listened and acted upon the concerns of family, friends, and the community who so often identify these people, who are a danger to others as well as themselves, as potential threats?

These are tough discussions and will take major initiatives to implement.  The current alternative, to ignore what is happening and to continually be jolted out of our daily life by the latest horrifying news is terrorizing and not effective in creating a more peaceful, harmonious world.  It’s time we take action and tackle this beast.

Your thoughts and comments are welcome.

Run to your local bookstore and put this book in your beach bag!

6/22/2023

Book Review: Lessons in Chemistry

When was the last time you read a book so good that you knew from the first chapter that you would be sorry when you turned the last page?  Debut author, who by the way published this book at the age of 65, hooked me right from the first page and never let me go as she takes us back in time to the way many of us who are near Garmun’s age remember.  However, this time we have the opportunity to experience what life was like for our mothers, aunts, and grandmothers.

Garmun is able to share the harsh truth of the past in a way that is not only palatable but humorous.  She had me placing all my money on the protagonist, Elizabeth Zott, right from the start knowing full well that this character had grit and a purpose she was committed to.

The dog, Six Thirty, voice is cleverly weaved into the story offering his own unique perspective on the events that unfold.  The remaining cast of characters is authentically portrayed.

What struck me most from the perspective of a fellow writer was the pace at which this story is told.  There was never a muddy middle, that weighed the story down.  There was not one unnecessary word adding fluff.  It was pure, rich storytelling that kept me engaged and excited to continue reading.

This is the kind of book that lends itself to lively dialogue at a book club meeting.  Its message is essential for women to hear today and Garmun delivers it in a way that will only further the rise of the divine feminine.

Run to your local bookstore, library or order the book available in hardcover, spiral bound, or audio format now: LINK

Susan Allison-Dean is the author of three women's fiction novels all featuring nurse protagonists.

Book Review: When Women Lead

2/13/2023

What happens when you add people from Venus to a boardroom traditionally filled with people from Mars?  In her new book When Women Lead, Julia Boorstin, CNBC’s Senior Media and Tech Correspondent, answers this question.  The results are so profound that every woman, father of a daughter, business owner, and yes, even a misogynist investor will want to read it.

Boorstin has interviewed top CEOs around the globe for years.  The Pandemic allowed her to sit down and write about some of her findings.  As Boorstin tells it, “Originally, I was going to write about the inspirational women entrepreneurs and CEOs I had interviewed, but when I started to delve into the data, it was so compelling, I had to include that in the book.”

In 2021, female-founded companies in the United States were awarded just two percent of venture capital deals and the checks written to male-owned companies were significantly larger.  This is just the beginning of the deep dive Boorstin takes the reader on as she exposes the reality of gender discrimination, workplace misconduct, and the existing imbalanced power ratio.  There is no sugar coating.  Boorstin is pragmatic in her reporting, even acknowledging the significant toll on society that has resulted from not including and supporting women leaders.

What’s different about this book, however, is that Boorstin has found and shared the stories of women who have broken through these hurdles.  Some names are familiar, like Reese Witherspoon and Gwyneth Paltrow.  The names and stories go far beyond white privileged women and span a variety of industries.

Today, women are shedding the shame of wanting their financial share of the pie and building profitable companies that have social missions for good.  Take the mother-daughter team, Melissa and Linda Hanna for example. Linda Hanna, a Registered Nurse and founder of a mobile lactation consulting service, My Nursing Coach, has helped countless new moms learn how to feed their infants.  When her daughter, Melissa, recognized the amazing impact her mother had on women from all walks of life, and the endless calls her mother was receiving, she recognized the need for a way to offer this essential care and knowledge to more women, with greater efficiency.  Melissa utilized her knowledge as an MBA student, to create a platform to capture all the elements of the business, partners, and needs of the users into a company called, Mahmee.  In 2021, Mahmee was one of the few women-owned companies awarded Venture Capital dollars to the tune of 9.2 million dollars in a series A investment.

Investing in women-owned and led companies is becoming of greater interest to investors not necessarily because of what their companies do, but as Boorstin bluntly puts it, they are making money.  Savvy women leaders are aware of this, and finding ways to navigate the delicate balance between creating a company with an important intention to them and making money doing it.

What do people from Venus offer that those from Mars don’t?  Boorstin shares evidence-based information on what women, and those who identify as women, bring to the table and how that amplifies the success of businesses.

In a world that often feels like it is in a state of chaos, When Women Lead, provides not only hope for a better world, but examples of women who are creating healthier, more sustainable, and more inclusive companies that will benefit all of us.  For those ready to take on the challenge to be the next successful women leader, the book includes resources and strategies that can help navigate the journey to the top.

Our Universe is filled with diverse wonder and is home to us all.  Let’s realign the planets here on earth for the good of all of us.

Order When Women Lead Today: LINK. Be sure to encourage your friends, families, colleagues, and perhaps even your bosses to pick up a copy as well. This would also make a great book club pick! Leave a review on your favorite bookstore website.

What makes a book a Beach read?

7/13/2022

I was at the library this morning and my eye caught a large sign over a group of books that said, “Beach Reads.”  I love the beach and I love to read, so naturally, I went over to take a look at what they were recommending.

The display had an assortment of books, some with inviting beachy covers, others not so much.  Current best-sellers weren’t there as they are already checked out and have long waiting lists. I recognize many of the titles but didn’t find myself intrigued enough by any of them to take one out.

That led me to wonder, what makes a book a beach read?  When I have described a book in this way it typically has one or a few of these characteristics-a light book, set in a beach community or island, with a happy ending, and a great beachy cover.  I am a sucker for a book with a beach cover, especially if it is tropical.  I enjoy a good tropical escape via my beach chair under an umbrella with the waves gently rolling onto the shore and seagulls occasionally squawking.  I will even indulge in a beach setting book from my favorite reading chair sitting in front of a blazing fire on a snowy day in January.  Many a book I have purchased just because the cover instantly takes me to a vacation destination in my mind.

“Beach Read” is not an official literary genre, so I guess any book could be given this label many of us look for as we head to the beach for our summer vacation. I’m curious.  How do you describe a beach read?  And what are you reading this summer as you lounge in the sand?

Older writers are defying ageism. Pick up a pen and write your book now.

7/13/2022

In this era where ageism is rampant, isn’t it great to see older writers hit it out of the park?  Ageism is prejudice or discrimination against people based on their age.  It is predominantly experienced by older Americans but can also affect younger people.  A poll conducted in 2020 found that 82% of older Americans reported experiencing ageism regularly.  Like other forms of discrimination, ageism can negatively impact the health and well-being of older adults.  It also sets a despondent tone for the generations that follow.

While some people feel and act like older people should be put on a shelf to collect dust or be stored in a back closet like a pair of old sneakers, older writers are packaging their years of life experience and generating stories that readers are gobbling up.  Older writers have real-life experience to reflect on and create novels with depth, historical perspective, and wisdom younger generations just can’t offer yet.

Delia Owens is one such example.  Owens published her first novel, Where The Crawdads Sing,  at the age of sixty-nine.  Her drama mystery set in the marshlands of North Carolina has shattered book sales records across the globe and has now been made into a motion picture produced by Reese Witherspoon.  Not bad, for an ‘old lady’, huh?

Sue Monk-Kidd published her first novel, Secret Life of Bees, at the age of fifty-three in 2001.  Her story of a young girl set in the south trying to find answers after her mother is tragically killed has sold over 8 million copies worldwide and has been adapted into a movie, and a musical off-Broadway play.

Other notable senior authors?  James Patterson now seventy-five continues to publish best-selling novels, many of which have become movies.  Nora Roberts has published over 225 novels and yet her new releases continue to be shelved on the New Fiction shelves in major bookstores across the country.  The list goes on!

Older writers have had time to polish the craft of writing.  They refuse to drink the ageism KoolAid.  They refuse to be put out to pasture.  They are seen on the back of book jackets, interviewed on popular shows, featured in magazine articles, and appear on the internet.  They inspire us all.

Looking for more inspiration to combat ageism? Read my latest book #CoolGrannies. Two sassy age-old friends hit the road in a modern Thelma & Louise story, minus the cliff.